- May 5th, 2019- Entertainment
Never mind “Valar Morghulis” — translation: “All Men Must Die” — that tired old “Game of Thrones” ad slogan from about three years ago.
I’ll settle for any major character at this point.
The official “Game of Thrones” Twitter account is certainly teasing that some carnage might finally happen this Sunday with a post Friday that spawned a frenzy of fan memes.
As we sat, peering at our television screens through Season 8’s penumbra-friendly Battle of Winterfell, I wondered, “How come everyone’s still standing?” And: “When is someone going to die already?”
I don’t mean the B Team: Theon, Jorah, Lyanna, etc. I mean the big guns. The names above the title.
Why, for example, is Tyrion still walking around? Ever since he went to work for Daenerys, he’s been a narrative flat tire. In addition, he can’t fight, he’s not funny, he doesn’t even give good advice.
Do they keep him around so Peter Dinklage can win another easy Emmy?
Everybody can’t be a hero on this show, so it’s time to get rid of those who clearly are not in the hero lane: Tyrion, Davos, Varys. Even Sansa’s getting boring. We have three more episodes left.
Someone. Must. Die.
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